Buttermilk the baby goat is kind of a dick.
Upside down in each pack
But I hate that people notice
When you gain three pounds,
But not when you buy a new hat.
I’ve been told that the way I sleep
With one leg draped over
The person lying next to me
But I think it’s annoying
When people tell me
I look pretty,
But only when I paint my face.
I’ve heard that old men
Like to touch the girls who work late at bars,
But I want to know
Why they never kiss the women they married
fourty-two years ago.
I’ve noticed that mothers teach their daughters
That it’s rude to refuse a hug
From an uncle they’ve met three times,
But forget to teach them
That they aren’t obliged to kiss
The boy who paid for dinner.
— (via giraffes)
when someone gets a lyric reference you made and then continues with the next line
- me: but it's 2 AM
- stomach: did i fucking stutter
you know you have hit your lowest point of being low when you start procrastinating your showers
- Me: I need to get an A on this test
- Me: Doesn't study
best moment in television ever
biggest plot twist in television EVER.
This was like THE ‘oh crap’ moment of the 90s
Seriously iconic, everyone knows about when Ross says Rachel